The Student News Site of Bloomfield Hills High School

Gabe Singer

Predicting my future

Well, I finally did it. 13 grueling years of primary education, all culminating towards the monumental moment when I walk across the stage and receive my diploma. What comes after that is unknown, as I will leave the sheltered cocoon that is adolescence, and blossom into an extraordinarily handsome young adult in this world (emphasis on the handsome). However, like most other geniuses, I have an inept ability to predict the future, so here is my forecast on how my next twelve years will play out. 

   Gabe will attend Michigan State University. As a sophomore, he will find his first love… and promptly get his heart broken. The breakup will be messy (I mean really messy). He claims it was because he was simply “too handsome” (again, it just cannot be overstated how handsome he is). In despair, he creates a Tik Tok that goes viral, prompting him to celebrity status as the next gen Z heartthrob. With his newfound fame, Gabe will move to LA. He will be paid outrageously for endorsements and media appearances, which slowly deteriorates his work ethic and appreciation for money. Like many other celebrities who get famous for doing nothing, he will eventually make some poor decisions and get caught up with the wrong crowd. Fortunately, he will leave his life of fame and fortune behind, and move back to Michigan. He will go back to school to become a teacher, and make it his mission to help kids like him (ones that are lazy and super handsome), changing the lives of countless young Gabe Singers along the way. He will follow his passion of writing by becoming an advisor for the school newspaper (as well as the basketball team) and will be tasked with making sure that seniors who may or may not have shown up to class for the last few weeks write their senior columns. 

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